A Woman's Vocabulary

This funny stuff right here, courtesy of my friend Amy. I always said that when a woman tells a man she'll be ready in2 minutes, that's the same length of time a man means when he says there's 2 minutes left in the game (in neither case is it two actual minutes, it can range from 5-30 or more, lol)...this just proves my point. Enjoy!

> (1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
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> (2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
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> (3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.
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> (4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!
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> (5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)
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> (6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. "That's okay" means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
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> (7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint...just say you're welcome.
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> (8) Whatever: Is a women's way of saying, up yours!
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> (9) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking "what's wrong," for the woman's response refer to # 3.