His recent attacks on Rush Limbaugh based on "quotes" that Limbaugh never actually said, FOXSports.com's Jason Whitlock is one of my favorite columnists about contemporary issues that have to do with sports and athletes. His columns are so interesting because they almost always have a new, unique angle or perspective that you will never hear from the mainstream media. Whether Whitlock himself personally holds these beliefs is irrelevant, because the job of a writer is to write interesting things that people will read with enthusiasm, and putting conventional wisdom down on paper won't get you there very often.
Most recently, ESPN baseball analyst Steve Phillips was fired from ESPN for his extramarital affair with a woman half his age. His mistress flipped out when he tried to end the affair, contacted his wife, and even tried to mess with his kids at school, but at least she didn't kill him like Steve McNair's mistress did. Although my faith and personal beliefs don't really permit me the luxury of believing in what Whitlock suggests as an actual solution to the affair pandemic for men (athletes and non-athletes alike), his suggestion to remove some of the taboo and social shame that comes with an affair at least makes some intellectual sense. Whitlock first brought up how destructive affairs can sometimes be (he calls the other woman phenomenon Strange Tang or Pussy Galore) in the case of Louisville basketball coach Rick Pitino, who banged a woman not his wife on the table of a restaurant and then had the woman try to extort money from him...not good times. Strange Tang has also claimed Texas Rangers outfielder Josh Hamilton, former Indiana Pacers hoops star Reggie Miller, and Dallas Mavericks superstar NBA F Dirk Nowitzki as its victims, and for every 3-4 of these cases we hear about, there are many more that we don't. The impact on the families of these men is inexcusable and even having an affair demonstrates terrible judgment, but as Whitlock says, affairs have absolutely no bearing on whether someone is a good coach, commentator, or athlete, and it's time to stop pretending otherwise.
Here are the money quotes from Whitlock's article, read and decide for yourself:
"There are moments in our history when common sense forces us to change the rules in deference to a unique, unprecedented force of nature. In the aftermath of ESPN baseball analyst Steve Phillips' sordid affair with Monica Lewinsky II, we can no longer deny the inadequacies of America's current relationship rules as they pertain to the battle against Pussy Galore.
It's time to change the rules of the game. There's been too much carnage. She shredded Rick Pitino's reputation. She pushed Josh Hamilton off the wagon. She sweet-talked Charles Barkley into driving drunk. She hoodwinked Dirk Nowitzki into falling in love with a fugitive. And now a 22-year-old slump-buster has apparently cost Steve Phillips his marriage and his credibility to analyze baseball. It's not right. A little off-the-books nookie should not infringe on man's ability to discuss bats and balls in October. Enough is enough. It's time we had an adult conversation about Ms. Galore and her ability to ruin lives, careers and reputations. We have given her this power and it's obvious she's abusing it.
...Let's put an end to the sexual madness. Let's recognize where we're at as a society and open our borders. Technological, medical and sociological advances have rendered monogamy a theory/fantasy attained solely by men without options and even less self-confidence. Sexual prohibition for a healthy American man is as futile as alcohol prohibition. Man was meant to eat, drink and be merry, and a heterosexual man's happiness is directly tied to his visitation privileges with PG. Man is most happy when he is free to experience her pleasure in her varied forms, textures and styles of dress.
I like steak. Capital Grille is my favorite steakhouse. I could eat at Capital Grille seven nights a week. But, especially when I'm traveling, I like to experience different steakhouses. My occasional trips to Shula's, Morton's, Ruth's Chris and Smith and Wollensky in no way infringe upon my undying love and support of Capital Grille. In fact, shortly after I've digested my meal at a different steakhouse, I'm reminded just how much I love Cap Grille.
Consequently, if a man can afford a no-disease, no-pregnancy occasional night on the town without it affecting his financial and lovemaking responsibilities at home, as mature adults we must reach the point where we can allow this without breaking up the family or running a man from political office/off the set of a popular TV show.
It's simply not personal. It's physical. And in many ways it's a weakness magnified by societal evolution. Monogamy was invented before women entered the workplace, text messaging, cell phones, Viagra, exercise, makeup, perfume, hair extensions, shaved legs, clothes that revealed cleavage, Internet porn and on and on. Seriously, think about it. Let's just go back 50 or 60 years. The typical American man didn't exercise and smoked cigarettes. By age 45 he was almost completely out of the game. Stress, hypertension and just being fat and lazy knocked about all the starch out of his little man. Marilyn Monroe could proposition him, and there was a 75 percent chance he couldn't answer the call to duty.
...Gender equality has given men more access to women. This is not a good thing for fidelity. Madonna, Britney, Paris and Lil' Kim haven't helped much, either. Women are far more sexually aggressive than they used to be. They'll describe in graphic detail exactly what they'll do that your wife can't or won't, and they'll back it up by texting you a naked cell-phone pic.
...It's long past time to change the rules. We have to quit judging married men by their ability or inability to keep it in their pants. Women are looking for love in the wrong place. It's not in our crotch. We keep lust there. Only humans are dumb enough to place such importance on sexual monogamy. It's unnatural. It's emotionally crippling. It destroys families. And it's wreaked havoc on ESPN's "Baseball Tonight" set. Harold Reynolds and Steve Phillips were arguably my two favorite baseball analysts.
Let's redefine marriage by putting sex in its proper place. Reproduction should remain sacred between a married man and woman. Sex should be enjoyed between consenting, mature adults.
I say a moderately famous man earning between $250K and $500K a year should be allowed a mistress he can see weekly, one week-long, $8,000 vacation he can take with his mistress and five strip club nights with his boys a year. A moderately famous man earning between $500K and $1 million a year should be allowed a mistress he can see weekly and every other weekend, a 10-day, $15,000 vacation with his mistress, a $1,500-a-month, fully-furnished apartment for his mistress and seven strip club nights with his boys.
Any man earning more than $1 million a year should come and go as he damn well pleases."
