I have been employed full-time pretty much my entire adult life, even through college and law school. The last time I had a full-time attorney job was in early March of this year, now over 8 months ago.
That is the longest period of time I have ever been without a full-time job in my entire life, and it sucked more than I can possibly put into words. There are so many things I took for granted up until recently, mainly having money of my own, being able to afford a few luxuries in life, working as a professional, and most importantly, being able to pay my bills. These things sound so small, right up until the minute they are taken away.
I was able to find part-time work as a softball umpire and flag football referee, which I sincerely enjoyed. The job paid better than most menial labor positions, and it did make a dent in my bills. However, the truth is that I would not have been able to pay my bills without the financial support from my family and friends, and I would have been homeless or living with my Dad if it weren't for my wife. I have already told my family and friends how much I appreciate their help during this difficult time, but I would be remiss if I didn't take a moment to express how truly wonderful my wife was over these last 8+ months. We had some disagreements about money, but she never once failed to help me when it was absolutely necessary. Althea, no matter what happens in the future, I will never forget how supportive you were when I needed you the most, so thank you, and I love you.
As you may have guessed by now, after putting out more than 250 application packages for jobs from Hawaii to Italy, I am blessed to be back working full-time at a job in downtown Nashville. My starting salary is about 10% less than I was making back in March, but I think that is a fair trade given the increased quality of life, good bosses, seemingly cool co-workers, and potential for advancement that comes with this position. Also, this job is actually closer to home than my last job, a nice little bonus. Today was my first day back to work, and it felt great being back at work as an attorney again. I have to give a big shout out to Terrance for getting me the interview that led to this job...brother, if you need my last can of pork and beans, you need only to ask. :) Although I know I have a lot to learn working in an area of the law I don't know much about (yet), I am eager to learn and willing to work hard, and that should serve me well. As an aside, I bear no ill will toward my last employer...they gave me a great opportunity and paid me fairly for my hard work, it was simply time for both of us to move on.
I haven't always done the best job handling money, but that is something upon which I sincerely intend to improve this time around, especially when it comes to rendering unto God what is rightfully His. When I was unemployed, I made a promise to God that, if he put me back to work, I would be faithful in my tithing, and that is something I have never done before. I truly believe that God keeps His word, so I look forward with interest to see what God will do when I am faithful with my finances. Lord, thank you for putting me back to work. I promise to work as hard as I can, and to do my work with integrity in a manner befitting your kingdom and showing appreciation for your blessings.
Monday, November 16, 2009
Friday, October 30, 2009
The Job Search is 99.9% Over
I've been unemployed or employed only part-time since March of this year. After nearly 8 months, I finally got a call today offering me a job. The reason I say the search is 99.9% over is because my future boss told me the interview process is over, that he had checked my references, and that he would like me to come and work in his department.
He told me that he still has to get my final salary number, and thus my final hiring approval, from the Personnel Department. As soon as the has that, I will get a start date, an office, and a firm salary figure. At that time, and not before, the search will be 100% over. I had a celebratory dinner at home with the wife tonight, but we will do something bigger and nicer to celebrate after I start my job and get my first paycheck.
I can't wait to get back to work, and a post full celebration of new job/reflection on my time between jobs will be coming in the very near future. But for now, today was a really good day, and it was a long time coming. Thank you Lord, for everything.
He told me that he still has to get my final salary number, and thus my final hiring approval, from the Personnel Department. As soon as the has that, I will get a start date, an office, and a firm salary figure. At that time, and not before, the search will be 100% over. I had a celebratory dinner at home with the wife tonight, but we will do something bigger and nicer to celebrate after I start my job and get my first paycheck.
I can't wait to get back to work, and a post full celebration of new job/reflection on my time between jobs will be coming in the very near future. But for now, today was a really good day, and it was a long time coming. Thank you Lord, for everything.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Jason Whitlock on Changing the Rules about Strange Tang
His recent attacks on Rush Limbaugh based on "quotes" that Limbaugh never actually said, FOXSports.com's Jason Whitlock is one of my favorite columnists about contemporary issues that have to do with sports and athletes. His columns are so interesting because they almost always have a new, unique angle or perspective that you will never hear from the mainstream media. Whether Whitlock himself personally holds these beliefs is irrelevant, because the job of a writer is to write interesting things that people will read with enthusiasm, and putting conventional wisdom down on paper won't get you there very often.
Most recently, ESPN baseball analyst Steve Phillips was fired from ESPN for his extramarital affair with a woman half his age. His mistress flipped out when he tried to end the affair, contacted his wife, and even tried to mess with his kids at school, but at least she didn't kill him like Steve McNair's mistress did. Although my faith and personal beliefs don't really permit me the luxury of believing in what Whitlock suggests as an actual solution to the affair pandemic for men (athletes and non-athletes alike), his suggestion to remove some of the taboo and social shame that comes with an affair at least makes some intellectual sense. Whitlock first brought up how destructive affairs can sometimes be (he calls the other woman phenomenon Strange Tang or Pussy Galore) in the case of Louisville basketball coach Rick Pitino, who banged a woman not his wife on the table of a restaurant and then had the woman try to extort money from him...not good times. Strange Tang has also claimed Texas Rangers outfielder Josh Hamilton, former Indiana Pacers hoops star Reggie Miller, and Dallas Mavericks superstar NBA F Dirk Nowitzki as its victims, and for every 3-4 of these cases we hear about, there are many more that we don't. The impact on the families of these men is inexcusable and even having an affair demonstrates terrible judgment, but as Whitlock says, affairs have absolutely no bearing on whether someone is a good coach, commentator, or athlete, and it's time to stop pretending otherwise.
Here are the money quotes from Whitlock's article, read and decide for yourself:
"There are moments in our history when common sense forces us to change the rules in deference to a unique, unprecedented force of nature. In the aftermath of ESPN baseball analyst Steve Phillips' sordid affair with Monica Lewinsky II, we can no longer deny the inadequacies of America's current relationship rules as they pertain to the battle against Pussy Galore.
It's time to change the rules of the game. There's been too much carnage. She shredded Rick Pitino's reputation. She pushed Josh Hamilton off the wagon. She sweet-talked Charles Barkley into driving drunk. She hoodwinked Dirk Nowitzki into falling in love with a fugitive. And now a 22-year-old slump-buster has apparently cost Steve Phillips his marriage and his credibility to analyze baseball. It's not right. A little off-the-books nookie should not infringe on man's ability to discuss bats and balls in October. Enough is enough. It's time we had an adult conversation about Ms. Galore and her ability to ruin lives, careers and reputations. We have given her this power and it's obvious she's abusing it.
...Let's put an end to the sexual madness. Let's recognize where we're at as a society and open our borders. Technological, medical and sociological advances have rendered monogamy a theory/fantasy attained solely by men without options and even less self-confidence. Sexual prohibition for a healthy American man is as futile as alcohol prohibition. Man was meant to eat, drink and be merry, and a heterosexual man's happiness is directly tied to his visitation privileges with PG. Man is most happy when he is free to experience her pleasure in her varied forms, textures and styles of dress.
I like steak. Capital Grille is my favorite steakhouse. I could eat at Capital Grille seven nights a week. But, especially when I'm traveling, I like to experience different steakhouses. My occasional trips to Shula's, Morton's, Ruth's Chris and Smith and Wollensky in no way infringe upon my undying love and support of Capital Grille. In fact, shortly after I've digested my meal at a different steakhouse, I'm reminded just how much I love Cap Grille.
Consequently, if a man can afford a no-disease, no-pregnancy occasional night on the town without it affecting his financial and lovemaking responsibilities at home, as mature adults we must reach the point where we can allow this without breaking up the family or running a man from political office/off the set of a popular TV show.
It's simply not personal. It's physical. And in many ways it's a weakness magnified by societal evolution. Monogamy was invented before women entered the workplace, text messaging, cell phones, Viagra, exercise, makeup, perfume, hair extensions, shaved legs, clothes that revealed cleavage, Internet porn and on and on. Seriously, think about it. Let's just go back 50 or 60 years. The typical American man didn't exercise and smoked cigarettes. By age 45 he was almost completely out of the game. Stress, hypertension and just being fat and lazy knocked about all the starch out of his little man. Marilyn Monroe could proposition him, and there was a 75 percent chance he couldn't answer the call to duty.
...Gender equality has given men more access to women. This is not a good thing for fidelity. Madonna, Britney, Paris and Lil' Kim haven't helped much, either. Women are far more sexually aggressive than they used to be. They'll describe in graphic detail exactly what they'll do that your wife can't or won't, and they'll back it up by texting you a naked cell-phone pic.
...It's long past time to change the rules. We have to quit judging married men by their ability or inability to keep it in their pants. Women are looking for love in the wrong place. It's not in our crotch. We keep lust there. Only humans are dumb enough to place such importance on sexual monogamy. It's unnatural. It's emotionally crippling. It destroys families. And it's wreaked havoc on ESPN's "Baseball Tonight" set. Harold Reynolds and Steve Phillips were arguably my two favorite baseball analysts.
Let's redefine marriage by putting sex in its proper place. Reproduction should remain sacred between a married man and woman. Sex should be enjoyed between consenting, mature adults.
I say a moderately famous man earning between $250K and $500K a year should be allowed a mistress he can see weekly, one week-long, $8,000 vacation he can take with his mistress and five strip club nights with his boys a year. A moderately famous man earning between $500K and $1 million a year should be allowed a mistress he can see weekly and every other weekend, a 10-day, $15,000 vacation with his mistress, a $1,500-a-month, fully-furnished apartment for his mistress and seven strip club nights with his boys.
Any man earning more than $1 million a year should come and go as he damn well pleases."
Most recently, ESPN baseball analyst Steve Phillips was fired from ESPN for his extramarital affair with a woman half his age. His mistress flipped out when he tried to end the affair, contacted his wife, and even tried to mess with his kids at school, but at least she didn't kill him like Steve McNair's mistress did. Although my faith and personal beliefs don't really permit me the luxury of believing in what Whitlock suggests as an actual solution to the affair pandemic for men (athletes and non-athletes alike), his suggestion to remove some of the taboo and social shame that comes with an affair at least makes some intellectual sense. Whitlock first brought up how destructive affairs can sometimes be (he calls the other woman phenomenon Strange Tang or Pussy Galore) in the case of Louisville basketball coach Rick Pitino, who banged a woman not his wife on the table of a restaurant and then had the woman try to extort money from him...not good times. Strange Tang has also claimed Texas Rangers outfielder Josh Hamilton, former Indiana Pacers hoops star Reggie Miller, and Dallas Mavericks superstar NBA F Dirk Nowitzki as its victims, and for every 3-4 of these cases we hear about, there are many more that we don't. The impact on the families of these men is inexcusable and even having an affair demonstrates terrible judgment, but as Whitlock says, affairs have absolutely no bearing on whether someone is a good coach, commentator, or athlete, and it's time to stop pretending otherwise.
Here are the money quotes from Whitlock's article, read and decide for yourself:
"There are moments in our history when common sense forces us to change the rules in deference to a unique, unprecedented force of nature. In the aftermath of ESPN baseball analyst Steve Phillips' sordid affair with Monica Lewinsky II, we can no longer deny the inadequacies of America's current relationship rules as they pertain to the battle against Pussy Galore.
It's time to change the rules of the game. There's been too much carnage. She shredded Rick Pitino's reputation. She pushed Josh Hamilton off the wagon. She sweet-talked Charles Barkley into driving drunk. She hoodwinked Dirk Nowitzki into falling in love with a fugitive. And now a 22-year-old slump-buster has apparently cost Steve Phillips his marriage and his credibility to analyze baseball. It's not right. A little off-the-books nookie should not infringe on man's ability to discuss bats and balls in October. Enough is enough. It's time we had an adult conversation about Ms. Galore and her ability to ruin lives, careers and reputations. We have given her this power and it's obvious she's abusing it.
...Let's put an end to the sexual madness. Let's recognize where we're at as a society and open our borders. Technological, medical and sociological advances have rendered monogamy a theory/fantasy attained solely by men without options and even less self-confidence. Sexual prohibition for a healthy American man is as futile as alcohol prohibition. Man was meant to eat, drink and be merry, and a heterosexual man's happiness is directly tied to his visitation privileges with PG. Man is most happy when he is free to experience her pleasure in her varied forms, textures and styles of dress.
I like steak. Capital Grille is my favorite steakhouse. I could eat at Capital Grille seven nights a week. But, especially when I'm traveling, I like to experience different steakhouses. My occasional trips to Shula's, Morton's, Ruth's Chris and Smith and Wollensky in no way infringe upon my undying love and support of Capital Grille. In fact, shortly after I've digested my meal at a different steakhouse, I'm reminded just how much I love Cap Grille.
Consequently, if a man can afford a no-disease, no-pregnancy occasional night on the town without it affecting his financial and lovemaking responsibilities at home, as mature adults we must reach the point where we can allow this without breaking up the family or running a man from political office/off the set of a popular TV show.
It's simply not personal. It's physical. And in many ways it's a weakness magnified by societal evolution. Monogamy was invented before women entered the workplace, text messaging, cell phones, Viagra, exercise, makeup, perfume, hair extensions, shaved legs, clothes that revealed cleavage, Internet porn and on and on. Seriously, think about it. Let's just go back 50 or 60 years. The typical American man didn't exercise and smoked cigarettes. By age 45 he was almost completely out of the game. Stress, hypertension and just being fat and lazy knocked about all the starch out of his little man. Marilyn Monroe could proposition him, and there was a 75 percent chance he couldn't answer the call to duty.
...Gender equality has given men more access to women. This is not a good thing for fidelity. Madonna, Britney, Paris and Lil' Kim haven't helped much, either. Women are far more sexually aggressive than they used to be. They'll describe in graphic detail exactly what they'll do that your wife can't or won't, and they'll back it up by texting you a naked cell-phone pic.
...It's long past time to change the rules. We have to quit judging married men by their ability or inability to keep it in their pants. Women are looking for love in the wrong place. It's not in our crotch. We keep lust there. Only humans are dumb enough to place such importance on sexual monogamy. It's unnatural. It's emotionally crippling. It destroys families. And it's wreaked havoc on ESPN's "Baseball Tonight" set. Harold Reynolds and Steve Phillips were arguably my two favorite baseball analysts.
Let's redefine marriage by putting sex in its proper place. Reproduction should remain sacred between a married man and woman. Sex should be enjoyed between consenting, mature adults.
I say a moderately famous man earning between $250K and $500K a year should be allowed a mistress he can see weekly, one week-long, $8,000 vacation he can take with his mistress and five strip club nights with his boys a year. A moderately famous man earning between $500K and $1 million a year should be allowed a mistress he can see weekly and every other weekend, a 10-day, $15,000 vacation with his mistress, a $1,500-a-month, fully-furnished apartment for his mistress and seven strip club nights with his boys.
Any man earning more than $1 million a year should come and go as he damn well pleases."
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
The Rules of Bedroom Golf
I found this list of "rules" on the Tall Cool Drink of Water blog...truly hilarious!
The Rules of Bedroom Golf
1. Each player shall furnish his own equipment for play.
2. Play on a course must be approved by the owner of the hole.
3. Unlike outdoor golf, the object is to get the club in the hole and keep the balls out.
4. For most effective play, the club should have a firm shaft. Course owners are permitted to check shaft stiffness before play begins.
5. Course owners reserve the right to restrict club length to avoid damage to the hole.
6. The object of the game is to take as many strokes as necessary until the course owner is satisfied that play is completed. Failure to do so may result in being denied permission to play the course again.
7. It is considered bad form to begin playing the hole immediately upon arrival at the course. The experienced player will normally take time to admire the entire course with special attention to well formed bunkers.
8. Players are cautioned not to mention other courses they have played, or are currently playing, to the owner of the course being played. Upset course owners have been known to damage players' equipment for this reason.
9. Players are encouraged to bring proper rain gear for their own protection.
10. Players should ensure themselves that their match has been properly scheduled, particularly when a new course is being played for the first time. Previous players have been known to become irate if they discover someone else playing on what they considered to be a private course.
11. Players should not assume a course is in shape for play at tall times. Some players may be embarrassed if they find the course to be temporarily under repair. Players are advised to be extremely tactful in this situation. More advanced players will find alternative means of play when this is the case.
12. The course owners is responsible for manicuring and pruning any bush around the hole to allow for improved viewing of alignment with, and approach to the hole.
13. Players are advised to obtain the course owners permission before attempting to play the back nine.
14. Slow play is encouraged. However, players should be prepared to proceed at a quicker pace, at least temporarily, at the course owners request.
15. It is considered outstanding performance, time permitting, to play the same hole several times in one match.
The Rules of Bedroom Golf
1. Each player shall furnish his own equipment for play.
2. Play on a course must be approved by the owner of the hole.
3. Unlike outdoor golf, the object is to get the club in the hole and keep the balls out.
4. For most effective play, the club should have a firm shaft. Course owners are permitted to check shaft stiffness before play begins.
5. Course owners reserve the right to restrict club length to avoid damage to the hole.
6. The object of the game is to take as many strokes as necessary until the course owner is satisfied that play is completed. Failure to do so may result in being denied permission to play the course again.
7. It is considered bad form to begin playing the hole immediately upon arrival at the course. The experienced player will normally take time to admire the entire course with special attention to well formed bunkers.
8. Players are cautioned not to mention other courses they have played, or are currently playing, to the owner of the course being played. Upset course owners have been known to damage players' equipment for this reason.
9. Players are encouraged to bring proper rain gear for their own protection.
10. Players should ensure themselves that their match has been properly scheduled, particularly when a new course is being played for the first time. Previous players have been known to become irate if they discover someone else playing on what they considered to be a private course.
11. Players should not assume a course is in shape for play at tall times. Some players may be embarrassed if they find the course to be temporarily under repair. Players are advised to be extremely tactful in this situation. More advanced players will find alternative means of play when this is the case.
12. The course owners is responsible for manicuring and pruning any bush around the hole to allow for improved viewing of alignment with, and approach to the hole.
13. Players are advised to obtain the course owners permission before attempting to play the back nine.
14. Slow play is encouraged. However, players should be prepared to proceed at a quicker pace, at least temporarily, at the course owners request.
15. It is considered outstanding performance, time permitting, to play the same hole several times in one match.
Thursday, October 15, 2009
We Had a Miscarriage
Ever since I was a teenager, I have looked forward to the day I would be a father myself. As a younger man, that desire had a lot to do with not repeating the same mistakes raising my own child(ren) that my father made. As I got older, it became more about passing on all the love I have to give, and the knowledge, experience, and wisdom I have gained in my 30 years (so far) on this planet...and of course, I'd still like to avoid the mistakes of past generations.
From a purely selfish perspective, I always wanted to wait a few years and enjoy my new marriage before having kids. However, Althea is a few years older than me, and is already a statistical outlier for a healthy pregnancy, so we had to start trying to get pregnant right after the wedding.
Given those desires, I was so happy when Althea told me she had a positive pregnancy test a couple of weeks ago. When we went to her OB/GYN appointment, the doctor told us her hormone levels were low and that she couldn't see much on the ultrasound, which was a cause for concern, so we made an appointment to come back in a couple of weeks. Unfortunately, we never made that appointment. Over the weekend, Althea started to have bleeding and severe stomach cramps, neither of which are supposed to happen when a woman is pregnant. Althea has one of the highest tolerances for pain of anyone I have ever known, so I knew that it was time to go to the hospital when she was curled up in the fetal position in our bedroom and unable to move.
We called her OB/GYN doctor, and she was so great, helping us even though it was the weekend. She called ahead and cleared the way for Althea to be admitted to the hospital as soon as we got there. We got to the hospital, and Althea got some pain medicine, but the bleeding didn't stop. We stayed the night at the hospital, and Althea was discharged the next day. At her next OB/GYN appointment a couple of days later, the doctor confirmed what we already knew...Althea had a miscarriage. One the one hand, I am glad she wasn't farther along in the pregnancy (i.e., long enough to know the sex, pick out a name, see the baby's features, etc.). On the other hand, it doesn't make me (or us) any less sad. I'm not sure why this happened...the doctor says miscarriages often happen when there will be major problems that might injure, deform, or kill the baby-to-be. I prefer to think that maybe God just needed our baby up in heaven with Him and the angels more than we needed him or her down here.
Regardless of the reason, all we can do is grieve, pray, heal, and try again when the doctor says we can. In the meantime, we will give thanks to God for allowing us to contribute one more beautiful soul to heaven. Even if we didn't get to meet this child here in this life, we will get to meet him or her one day in heaven, and I can't wait.
From a purely selfish perspective, I always wanted to wait a few years and enjoy my new marriage before having kids. However, Althea is a few years older than me, and is already a statistical outlier for a healthy pregnancy, so we had to start trying to get pregnant right after the wedding.
Given those desires, I was so happy when Althea told me she had a positive pregnancy test a couple of weeks ago. When we went to her OB/GYN appointment, the doctor told us her hormone levels were low and that she couldn't see much on the ultrasound, which was a cause for concern, so we made an appointment to come back in a couple of weeks. Unfortunately, we never made that appointment. Over the weekend, Althea started to have bleeding and severe stomach cramps, neither of which are supposed to happen when a woman is pregnant. Althea has one of the highest tolerances for pain of anyone I have ever known, so I knew that it was time to go to the hospital when she was curled up in the fetal position in our bedroom and unable to move.
We called her OB/GYN doctor, and she was so great, helping us even though it was the weekend. She called ahead and cleared the way for Althea to be admitted to the hospital as soon as we got there. We got to the hospital, and Althea got some pain medicine, but the bleeding didn't stop. We stayed the night at the hospital, and Althea was discharged the next day. At her next OB/GYN appointment a couple of days later, the doctor confirmed what we already knew...Althea had a miscarriage. One the one hand, I am glad she wasn't farther along in the pregnancy (i.e., long enough to know the sex, pick out a name, see the baby's features, etc.). On the other hand, it doesn't make me (or us) any less sad. I'm not sure why this happened...the doctor says miscarriages often happen when there will be major problems that might injure, deform, or kill the baby-to-be. I prefer to think that maybe God just needed our baby up in heaven with Him and the angels more than we needed him or her down here.
Regardless of the reason, all we can do is grieve, pray, heal, and try again when the doctor says we can. In the meantime, we will give thanks to God for allowing us to contribute one more beautiful soul to heaven. Even if we didn't get to meet this child here in this life, we will get to meet him or her one day in heaven, and I can't wait.
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Letalvis Cobbins Found Guilty in Christian and Newsom Torture Slaying
I previously blogged about the gruesome torture, rape, and murder of Chris Newsom and Channon Christian, a young white Knoxville couple by 4 black men in a run down house in a rough part of town in Knoxville. The first defendant, Letalvis Cobbins, went on trial in a Knoxville court with a jury chosen from Nashville due to pretrial publicity. In terms of legal strategy, this was a smart move by Cobbins' lawyers, as Nashville is considerably more liberal than Knoxville.
Cobbins was found guilty of most of the crimes he was charged with and pled guilty to some other charges. Although he was eligible for the death penalty, the jury, for reasons known only to them and to God, gave him life without parole instead. I wrote to Michelle Malkin to update her on the case, and she was kind enough to publish my e-mail update on her blog. This is the second time I have made her blog, and while that's very cool, I sincerely wish the circumstances were different.
Accused ringleader Lemaricus Davidson goes on trial for his role in the slayings later this year, and I hope that jury doesn't repeat this one's disgrace. Hopefully they will give Davidson the death penalty he deserves and these kids and their families the justice they deserve.
Cobbins was found guilty of most of the crimes he was charged with and pled guilty to some other charges. Although he was eligible for the death penalty, the jury, for reasons known only to them and to God, gave him life without parole instead. I wrote to Michelle Malkin to update her on the case, and she was kind enough to publish my e-mail update on her blog. This is the second time I have made her blog, and while that's very cool, I sincerely wish the circumstances were different.
Accused ringleader Lemaricus Davidson goes on trial for his role in the slayings later this year, and I hope that jury doesn't repeat this one's disgrace. Hopefully they will give Davidson the death penalty he deserves and these kids and their families the justice they deserve.
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Why Pro Athletes Should Never Marry
Fox Sports columnist Jason Whitlock waxes philosophic about why pro athletes should never marry, at least not in the prime of their careers at the peak of their earning capacity. Whitlock is talking about this topic in light of Steve McNair's recent murder, but as he astutely points out, it is bigger than that.
My take is that pro athletes and professionals (doctors, lawyers, etc.), should hold off on marriage as long as possible. I always wanted to be married before I finished law school so I would know my wife wasn't with me just because I am a lawyer, but it wasn't meant to be. Strangely, although my occupation is a good conversation piece and is somewhat impressive to the ladies, it was never the basis of a relationship. Even now, my wife respects me because I am an attorney, but she would be happy with me no matter what I did as long as I was happy and could be a good provider. I waited until I was almost 30 to get married, and it was a wise thing to do. I would recommend it to pro football players, because that's when they usually start on the downside of their careers (except for elite quarterbacks, who can play into their late 30s or early 40s). Bottom line, if pro athletes who stand to make a fortune aren't married before they get rich, they should stay single until their playing days are over, or at a minimum, they should get the best lawyer they can find and have the woman sign the most ironclad prenuptial agreement possible.
Money quotes are below, check it out.
"Besides a strip club, massage parlor or whore house, I can't think of a work environment less supportive of a monogamous, healthy relationship than a men's locker room.
Strange Tang is the No. 1 topic of conversation inside a locker room. It's not steroids, the playbook or the next opponent. It's gossip about strip clubs, girls met in soon-to-be-visited cities on Facebook and Myspace and getting drunk.
Oh, you might occasionally overhear someone on the God Squad chitchatting about the next Bible study or the evils of the Internet porn they accidently looked at for 90 minutes. But mostly the locker room is a haven for unapologetic sinners. It's a place where you pick up a lot of bad habits.
A professional locker room is filled with in-shape, wealthy young men. They're carted around the country in private planes. They're at an age when they and their peers are supposed to do their hardest partying. They're members of an elite fraternity, and their membership in the fraternity can expire at any moment.
What would you do? More than likely, you'd go as hard as you could for as long as you could.At the very least, you'd occasionally dabble.
Why get married?
The athlete and the wife know it's a lie on their wedding day. He knows he's on a moving train and he can't jump off. She knows she jumped on that moving train and it never really slowed the whole time they were dating. It might've momentarily stopped, unloaded old passengers and re-boarded new ones, but she knows exactly where the train is headed and has a pretty good estimate on just how many miles are left on the trip.
The desperate hope is the marriage will survive until he retires and then the train will stop for good. That's the biggest pipe dream going. By the time the train stops, he absolutely loves the ride. He can't sleep without the steady hum of the tracks, the rocking of the compartment, the look and the smell of the new passengers.
He's a full-blown addict in desperate need of his next high when they retire his jersey. That's why he's hitting on teenagers working the drive-thru window at fast food joints. That's why he's proposing to 22-year-old strippers. He has a habit to feed.
If you're a millionaire athlete and you haven't made the mistake of impregnating half the women in your old neighborhood/college campus, why not hire someone to clean your house, prepare your home-cooked meals and date whomever you choose, whenever you choose? Get over your insecurity that you better lock her up while you're in the league because she might not want you when you get cut and she figures out the only money-producing skill you have is throwing a football, fielding a groundball or hitting a three off a screen.
There's a damn good chance she's just as insecure as you are and has less to offer. She'll wait. Or someone just like her will.
They say it's cheaper to keep her. The truth is, most athletes should never purchase anything. Just test drive. That way, the new car smell they love never goes away."
My take is that pro athletes and professionals (doctors, lawyers, etc.), should hold off on marriage as long as possible. I always wanted to be married before I finished law school so I would know my wife wasn't with me just because I am a lawyer, but it wasn't meant to be. Strangely, although my occupation is a good conversation piece and is somewhat impressive to the ladies, it was never the basis of a relationship. Even now, my wife respects me because I am an attorney, but she would be happy with me no matter what I did as long as I was happy and could be a good provider. I waited until I was almost 30 to get married, and it was a wise thing to do. I would recommend it to pro football players, because that's when they usually start on the downside of their careers (except for elite quarterbacks, who can play into their late 30s or early 40s). Bottom line, if pro athletes who stand to make a fortune aren't married before they get rich, they should stay single until their playing days are over, or at a minimum, they should get the best lawyer they can find and have the woman sign the most ironclad prenuptial agreement possible.
Money quotes are below, check it out.
"Besides a strip club, massage parlor or whore house, I can't think of a work environment less supportive of a monogamous, healthy relationship than a men's locker room.
Strange Tang is the No. 1 topic of conversation inside a locker room. It's not steroids, the playbook or the next opponent. It's gossip about strip clubs, girls met in soon-to-be-visited cities on Facebook and Myspace and getting drunk.
Oh, you might occasionally overhear someone on the God Squad chitchatting about the next Bible study or the evils of the Internet porn they accidently looked at for 90 minutes. But mostly the locker room is a haven for unapologetic sinners. It's a place where you pick up a lot of bad habits.
A professional locker room is filled with in-shape, wealthy young men. They're carted around the country in private planes. They're at an age when they and their peers are supposed to do their hardest partying. They're members of an elite fraternity, and their membership in the fraternity can expire at any moment.
What would you do? More than likely, you'd go as hard as you could for as long as you could.At the very least, you'd occasionally dabble.
Why get married?
The athlete and the wife know it's a lie on their wedding day. He knows he's on a moving train and he can't jump off. She knows she jumped on that moving train and it never really slowed the whole time they were dating. It might've momentarily stopped, unloaded old passengers and re-boarded new ones, but she knows exactly where the train is headed and has a pretty good estimate on just how many miles are left on the trip.
The desperate hope is the marriage will survive until he retires and then the train will stop for good. That's the biggest pipe dream going. By the time the train stops, he absolutely loves the ride. He can't sleep without the steady hum of the tracks, the rocking of the compartment, the look and the smell of the new passengers.
He's a full-blown addict in desperate need of his next high when they retire his jersey. That's why he's hitting on teenagers working the drive-thru window at fast food joints. That's why he's proposing to 22-year-old strippers. He has a habit to feed.
If you're a millionaire athlete and you haven't made the mistake of impregnating half the women in your old neighborhood/college campus, why not hire someone to clean your house, prepare your home-cooked meals and date whomever you choose, whenever you choose? Get over your insecurity that you better lock her up while you're in the league because she might not want you when you get cut and she figures out the only money-producing skill you have is throwing a football, fielding a groundball or hitting a three off a screen.
There's a damn good chance she's just as insecure as you are and has less to offer. She'll wait. Or someone just like her will.
They say it's cheaper to keep her. The truth is, most athletes should never purchase anything. Just test drive. That way, the new car smell they love never goes away."
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